Yo Yo what's up DAWGS? It is Gangsta Guinness here with an update on Groucho.
So now that Groucho has some down time he has been working on his new Rap Album. I am his producer. We are able to download the tunes directly into the alien antenna on top of his head.
I mean, you have all seen his revolutionary breakdance moves and heard his unique sound--the dude has practically invented his own brand of music...we figure we should capitalize on his talents. So we are going to be rich and it's going to be gold chains and Hot Rods for everyone...
Groucho's official name is G.G Fatty Loaf A.K.A Vile Sheets. We got his name off "Get your own Rap name " website... click here http://www.myrapname.com/ if you want your own rap name. All you dawgs out there! and let us know what it is. Guinness OUT!
Guinness here. We lost our dear friend Tavish. She was Gramps and Grams faithful companion. She was very old. Everyone who met her fell in love with her.
She was soft and gentle. You can just tell that in her sweet face. She had the best life that any dog could ever want.
So we must be sad a little, but mostly happy for the goodness she brought to our lives. There is a new little human pup on the way any day now--over in Newfoundland. And so Gram and Gramps will be real grandparents now...and a new chapter in our lives will begin...
One life moves on, and another one steps in. It is funny how that is. But Tavish hasn't really left. Our memories of her and the joy she brought stay with us, and we carry that love in our hearts. She is part of us forever and so she lives on within us.
i am sure one night i will find the place
of your kind, brown eyes and your gentle face,
Where the wild wind is born and there you will be,
Guinness here--walk with me for a bit while I tell you about Groucho. Last week, Groucho dislocated his hip AGAIN the day before he was due to get his sling off. It was kind of my mom's fault. She went over to his house and he followed her downstairs without anyone noticing...
Then he couldn't get back UP the stairs on 3 legs. So she tried to gently "bum boost" him. Well, on that last step the little guy got over ambitious and did a sort of jump to the top...
...and that is when it happened. Hmmm...the cows look good. So now he has to keep his sling on for TWO WEEKS and no fooling around this time or it could mean surgery if it happens again. The vet said this was not a breed thing, or a dog thing or an age thing...it was just a fluke thing.
Let's rest here a bit... Where was I? Oh yes, just like any human can dislocate their shoulder, so can any alien dislocate their hip. Guess he shouldn't have been practicing his levitational skills in bed. SOB.
Well, my humans went over to Groucho's for supper and here inlies the scandal.
This is called a "Maritime Turkey Dinner" and WE WERE NOT INVITED!
Worst of all, we could not enlist the help of Groucho's other worldly levitational skills to sneak us some. See look--here he is in jail! He has to be kept still and quiet.
And see him knocked out cold? It is because he is on drugs too! He has been rendered completely useless. So no lobster for us...and for a little while, no Groucho either.